CULTIVATES TRUST & SAFETY

 20220331 Module 7

Key Idea: Partners with the client to create a safe, supportive environment that allows the client to share freely. Maintains a relationship of mutual respect & trust.

When a baby first enters into this world, one of her first natural responses is to cry; And that is because she is no longer in the safe & familiar confines of her mother’s womb. Every person, from the moment we are born, seeks to be in a safe & comfortable place. Our bodies are wired in such a way that whenever we sense a threat to our safety, we will switch into a “fight or flight” response. Our senses become heightened, our hearts beat faster, our heads get dizzy or lightheaded, our breathing becomes faster & shallower, and the muscles all over our bodies tense up in a stressed state. We crave safety, and are willing to fight to get it.

It is said that children reserve their worst behaviours for their parents, because that is when they feel safest to just let go and be their real selves. Children trust that no matter what their worst meltdowns & irrational behaviours are, mummy & daddy would always love and accept them for who they are. They can be themselves in reckless abandon (much to the chagrin of mummy & daddy). Likewise, when people feel safe with you, they are comfortable enough to be in their own skin and release their thoughts without fear of judgement and rejection.

As a youth, one of my favourite Bible verses is Proverbs 3:5, that talks about trusting God with all of my heart, even when things don’t seem to make sense. I mean, how do you trust things are gonna go well when things don’t make sense? You can, when you trust the One who makes it happen. For example, living in a high-rise apartment, I walk into the elevator every single day. I have no clue how it works, but I trust the engineers enough to know what they are doing. They have created a product that is reliable, safe & supportive enough for me to risk my life and walk into every single day.

So in the coaching context, when we are able to create a product (or space or environment) that is reliable, safe & supportive, the client can trust that every single time they walk into our coaching space, they be themselves, and be willing to risk their lives (mind, emotions, future, etc.) in our hands. And when that happens, please remember to never break the trust.

The following sub-elements to this competency gives a guide on creating a safe space:

1. Seeks to serve the client's context.

2. Adapts to client’s style, perceptions, language.

3. Respects client’s talents, insights and work.

4. Shows support, empathy, concern.

5. Acknowledges client’s feelings, concerns, suggestions.

6. Demonstrates transparency, displays vulnerability.